Reminiscing Binky..

This blog is in beloved memory of the Original Binky! Cuz’ guess what? Binky cloned itself into TWO. For those of you who haven’t yet met Eshaal and her beloved Binky, this blog will make no sense. One can never separate Eshaal and Binky save for a few yards! My baby has developed a deep relationship with her comfort blanket. She cannot sleep without it, she can play for hours with it, she can hush-up in seconds because of it, she can drag and clean our floors with it and she will start laughing like crazy when she sees it. Asad questions her dependency on it, but I’m sure she will outgrow it. And well another more selfish reason: Hell, it makes my life so much easier!

Since my blanket-addicted baby cannot survive a day without it, washing it is a nightmare. It’s a no-room-for-errors-mistakes-or-delays mission, which has to be planned and executed like ‘laundry-pros’. Plus, we have to haul it for the car rides (as my very generous daughter has donated her Binky’s smaller version to Carrefour!) It’s just nerve-wracking to keep track of Binky’s every move. So, we decided to split the blanket into two Binky clones… and have successfully deceived our lil baby girl! Although she doesn’t seem to care, I, on the other hand, was having flashbacks while cutting and hemming her lil pink princess blanket. My wee lil baby and her Binky together at the hospital, at home, travelling all across the globe... I am so going to miss her baby-hood, even though it’s not over yet.

(My Baby and her Binky – A trip down memory lane)

May 'End' June

This month has been emotionally and physically taxing. We found an apartment, moved into it; celebrated Eshaal’s Birthday and are still in the process of settling down. A lot went down, good and bad. One doesn’t mind the arduous tasks, but what’s challenging are the parenting wars, differences in opinion, lack of empathy, not wanting to meet half-way, the ego-battles, miscommunication and the list kinda goes on. Though it doesn’t mean you experience them in their full-blown intensity or in one big chunk, but every relationship bumps into them periodically. A few days later you can laugh about it. But when it’s actually going down, boyy do you wish God installed a microphone option in your larynx!

Anyhoodles, I made some June resolutions!

a)      Start eating better and healthier home-cooked food.

b)      Get going on Eshaal’s swimming.

c)      Pay attention to what Asad has to say about the house and Eshaal.

(You won’t even know what hit you!)

Number 1

My baby turned 1 today (MA). Even though I am excited about having a whole digit to my baby’s age, the B-day passed by just like any other. Getting Cerelac on the floor, making silly faces, throwing the camera around, getting chocolate onto her stockings, cuddling, pulling Bubbles ears, funny bath moments, falling off the couch, etc. etc. Asad and I aren’t really Birthday people. But, since this was my first child’s first birthday, we did have a lil’ party the day before.

(Yes, there’s the B-day Baby, decked in frilly-ness & pink-ness)

(..And the actual B -day. Out to buy a present)

(The End to a very special day in her life...)

Although her lil’ party is over, I still have to deal with bowls and bowls of leftovers. We did try our best to hog as much as we could, but there’s still so much to go. I hate leftovers! Asad isn’t ecstatic about them either (obviously). And I’m definitely not throwing out the food. Just will have to hog down some more (for the rest of the week...)

 (..Unless, I figure out how Biryani and Guacamole go together)

Queen Bee..

Living alone, by ourselves has its perks. You are the Queen Bee to the place you call home. Your husband isn’t oh-so-interested on how you run the house, as long as there’s an unlimited supply of food, Gatorade and clean shirts! Of course, there are those unsaid agreements that you have to follow, like, no Hyderabadi food on the table, no Bubbles on the arm chairs, no Eshaal near the laptop, etc. etc. But life’s good, and soon there comes a moment when you know of none other lifestyle than having utter and total reigns to the house. Queen Bee. But, sometimes in those rare situations when you have actually moved to another house, where both you and husband have a gzillion work to take care of, disagreements pop up like candy from a piñata. Reason: The husband critiques a decision and the wife no longer can take criticism.

Fiz:         Let’s put this mat here.

Asad:     Why would you want to put it under the shoe rack? It looks cheap.

Fiz:         Because I like it there! I want it under!

Asad:     Maybe, we should put this basket here?

Fiz:         Nooo, how can it go there! It spoils the whole look! Why would you do that?!

Asad:     Were not going to use this kettle, our old one’s good.

Fiz:         I want the new one!  It’s so hard to make Eshaal’s bottle in this one. You don’t even know what I go through every day!!

Yes, the Queen Bee doesn’t do well when her ‘subjects’ question her. But lately, she’s realized she should be the humble and sweet Queen Bee, who should put her ‘subjects’ interests before her. So she will address this issue with e-reading on this matter. They say you have to take deep breaths, not to react impulsively or defensively, not to take it personally, but, constructively… We could try that.

(..Or this. I am the Queen Bee after all.)

Birthday Suit?

We’re at the new place! It’s amazing. I love it so much (MA.) If there ever were a within-the-budget dream house, this is it! Just trying to settle down, unpack and get things in order. But, I must say, we did an impressive job. 4hrs was all it took for the movers to get-in and get-out. Everything was so super organized for them. Maybe I just might write a whole blog report on the moving.

Eshaal has surprised us so much. She has started walking really well and today I understood why. Our old house had many furniture pieces scattered out, so she’d just hold-walk from one plane to another. The new house is all empty; we still have to rearrange furniture. So there’s plenty of space for her to actually take steps. She’s really happy; you can actually see the pride on her face. My baby, not even a year old and doing so much (MA)... And this reminds me, I’m facing hopeless confusion regarding my baby’s Birthday suit (No, not that one).  Shall I dress her in frilly-ness and pink-ness? Or will it be chic and peachy? Or maybe we could go for Baby-Vogue and green? Confusions, confusion. Too bad there aren’t three sides to a coin, ‘cuz I ain’t bothering with tossing it thrice! I think I’ll let her pick.

Battling future Amnesia?

Somehow Facebook seems to be celebrating a lot of birthdays just now.. That or maybe I’m on the lookout for anything to do with B-days. This time around, I’m actually excited about mine as well. Even though I missed the opportunity of celebrating it in Dubai (moving to another apartment is far far better) Don’t know what the next year holds for me? Another baby I’d like to think! (Asad, are you reading this) Come 19May I will be 23 and come 21May Eshaal will Hit a whole Year (MA) Life’s moving just way too fast these days.. She rolled, she sat, she crawled and she conquered! Yep my lil’ wee baby has started walking (MA)

While she’s growing up, I’m growing old. The worst part is, I keep forgetting where I put things (Did I mention I will be 23?) Expired yoghurt you shall find in my fridge, expired mushroom cans you shall find in my pantry cabinet, expired make-up you shall find in my drawers. Buried somewhere else will be Baby clothes that Eshaal will never wear because her mother couldn’t remember she had bought them. It’s frustrating. Although I pride myself on being super organized, some things just slip out.. But, not anymore. I have touched and examined every pore of my house, from the smallest hair pin to the largest arm chair! Nothing has been above my crazed- scrutiny. I now have an inventory of everything and where it’s stored.

I feel great moving to the new place,

Where everything shall be where it ought to be.

Linens, spoons, heels and spaghetti,

And yes, Queen I shall be sipping my tea!

 

I hope that's not Asad and me 10 years from now. Although, he is’nt any better at remembering either. Maybe we should start eating Almonds (like that would help)

Hurra' Young Mommy

Around morning, chopping some onions to make mince, I started thinking..

Being a young, inexperienced Mother is cool. It has certain pros attached to it that maybe a more wisely and mature mother might be unaware of. Of course, this is by no means a generalization. I admit Young mothers can be terribly reckless, we read about it all the time. But for me, it has been very lucrative.

A.I do the Science!

I admit I don’t have much experience. The most interactive I’ve been with a baby was Sofia, a mild-mannered two-year olds diaper change! I am lost on a number of occasions, specially, when my baby proceeds to give me the most unfathomable of situations to deal with. Knowing you’re ignorant can be a blessing. You strive that much more to excel in your weakness. I know I only got one shot bringing my baby up as healthy, confident and smart enough to know right from wrong. There is no reset button. I read, re-read and then, some more - Finding out the million perspectives on a situation before mixing up my own. It almost always works. The ‘wisely mother’ might not be so open to the new ideas surrounding Parenting & Motherhood. They think they know it all.

B. I remember being a Child..

Asad: Why is she going there again?

Fiz: umm.. Because she’s a baby?

Asad: She doesn’t listen, she’s spoiled!

(Fiz removes Eshaal from the laptop (Read, her drumming gear)

I can understand why she wants to go there. I remember being a curious one. Knowing how to empathize with your baby is so fruitful. I get less mad or upset. I know why she has to do what she has to do. Because, I remember..  Asad doesn’t. The ‘wisely mother’ might not remember the oh-so-important-strong-feelings-and-opinions she once had as a child. Her child might go through the same phases she did. I feel great knowing, come those teenage years, things will be a tad bit less testing (for I was one crazy, rebellious kid and I know that now!)

Yep, that was me almost a year ago! Feels good to have crossed the one year line. Cant wait for Eshaal's Birthday. Just two more weeks left! Yipeeee!

A New High!

This world is one big psychological study. That being said, I am the quintessential person for all case studies (except maybe sociopath's or Alzheimer’s or Schizophrenic's or MPD’s or…) Okay correction: I am the quintessential masterpiece of quite some facets of case studies (the almost-normal ones) Yep, I like that. For example: How many people can tickle themselves? Yes, you heard me. How many have RLS? How many can play whole movie sequences in their dreams? And to top it off, how many can actually go back to their favorite dreams?  Ha!

I feel all smug, hi-and-mighty right now. A complete narcist. I made the greatest Pulao in the history of Pulao-making (Why does that sound so familiar..) I think packing makes me high! I’ve been all over the place since yesterday, which was the official day 1 of packing. Imagine, all those boxes and boxes ready to be stuffed in the most precise jigsaw puzzle way possible. 3/10 boxes done and going steady. I love this.

P.s: Were moving. And Eshaal and Bubbles think it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to them (they’re high too, on the million things-to-destroy-within-their-reach)

He's dead? now what?

Going through my fair share of Osama Bin Laden’s death clips, I came across something that touched me more than the issue about a terrorist’s death. How is an event worthy of a National holiday, not as striking as what I was to read and feel later... 10 years is a long time for a not-a-direct-victim to care about! That, and the fact I don’t even know if they’re true.  I have stopped caring. They say he killed thousands of innocent men, women and children, but the US. Govt. did the same in Afghanistan and Iraq. How am I supposed to rejoice or feel anything when it was never about this one man! What of all those surrounding his mere identity (And they are MANY.) The people of America, Afghanistan, Iraq, Pakistan who have lost, random people who have died all over the globe because of this. How, is this one death even remotely justified? There is no rejoice. At this point, given the turn of events.. I feel indifferent to his death. (Do made-up, imaginary people die?)

More gripping to me was when I came across the horrifying stories of Elizabeth Swan, Natascha Kampusch and so many other cases of children kept in captivity! As a mother I am sickened, scared. How can anyone protect their own in this world? This, I feel much about..